Spider-Matt's Random Thoughts

Some Things Have to Change & Other Things Never Will

Thu, 18 Jun 2009 08:11:06 GMT

There are certain sensations—smells, sights, sounds—that, when experienced, blast me back to Korea. I need only a whiff of kimchi or the sound of a common album in my music rotation during those 12 months and I once again feel like a new sailor, experiencing a new world full of unknown possibilities for the first time. There is something exciting about this feeling. It reminds me of a time when my future didn’t worry me as much as it excited me and my sense of indomitability was twofold what it is today. I’m happy for the experiences I have behind me and I’m still excited for the experiences ahead but I’d be a liar if I said I didn’t have an unshakable anxiety about exactly how I’m going to proceed once I’m out of the military. Life is so easy with a steady paycheck and medical coverage encompassed by a job a monkey could do. Sadly, this life has deteriorated my ambition. That’s what I miss most from those early days in the navy.

I’m reminded of this past ambitiousness with the help of two people who became, and continue to be, a stable source of reassurance during the course of my time in Korea. Michael Mills’ has ambition that has consistently surpassed my own, a difficult and admirable trait. His intelligence, confidence, and optimism drew me to him instantly. I felt that I understood him on a basic level and, though I wouldn’t want to speak for him, I think the feeling was mutual. He’s out of the navy now and attending UNLV. I’m glad I had the opportunity to visit him for New Year’s. It reminded me that some things have to change and other things never will. We went to see Penn & Teller at New York New York, a favorite perceptive duo of ours whose television show Bullshit! gave us hours of entertainment, especially during those long 12 hour watches. Discussions of our ambitions gave me confidence in Korea and his continued advice (it’s better described as words about his view on life that I take as advice) continues to ease my mind. As a veteran living off the bounties of the GI Bill, he was able to help me with my own concerns, at the forefront of which is my unknown future well-being. Everyone getting out of the military to go to school is confused and shares my concerns, he told me. They live.

The other person is Mark Malinowski. You may have heard of him because a consequence of being one of my best friends is recurring references by me. He’s native to Arizona and has never let my adulation of Boston get in the way of his adoration of his home state. We first exchanged words with each other at the Phoenix airport the day we shipped out to boot camp. We wound up in the same IT A School class. We didn’t take to each other very well at first. When we got the same orders and his best friend in the class got the orders I wanted (to the Blue Ridge), the friend and I tried to switch. It didn’t work out and I couldn’t be happier with the results. Having spent a long four-and-a-half months last summer on the USS Blue Ridge and seeing the two people from my class still at the same command as when I arrived in Korea, as if sitting in stagnant water (to make a pun), I am elated to have avoided being based on that ship. If my orders had gotten switched, I would have lost the opportunity for one of the best friendships I’ve ever had.

Discussions between Mark and me on the course our lives will take are frequent. We have looked to each other for advice and now share the same challenge of leaving the navy successfully and smoothly. Until recently, he did not know if he would reenlist or not. Being the live-and-let-live person that I am, I tried hard not to project my negative feelings of the navy on him but I couldn’t resist jabs at the military lifestyle that I felt were well-deserved. Most of all, I feared making a recommendation he would take to heart and later realize he didn’t like, putting some blame on me. Writing that down makes me feel silly because Mark and I both know our decisions are our own. I know Mark would never make any decision of import based on mere recommendation and without long deliberation. He’s too careful and concerned, respectable traits to be sure.

When Mark made his final decision and told me he would be leaving the navy to attend ASU, I was excited, to say the least. The prospect of sharing the collegiate experience with someone whom I have already shared so many other experiences is strangely comforting. I haven’t told him this, of course. It’s a rare occurrence for me to directly share my emotions with others but I can be rest assured that he knows anyway. A meddling side effect of spending so much time with such an observant individual is that he catches on quickly to how a person thinks.

I don’t think I have hitherto appropriately expressed the how and why of the two most important people I’ve met in the navy. The rest of you who have made a similar impact on my life have your own commemorations elsewhere in my voluminous anthology of egomaniacal literature, whether you know it or not. As I sit here listening to Mike Doughty, a favorite of mine during my stay in Korea, I am reminded of what it was like to be so green at this navy gig and how important two friendships have been from the beginning.

We Talked Literature and Music

Fri, 15 May 2009 13:36:59 GMT

I know how happy (read: indifferent) you guys are when I post new photos, so I'll start this post off with that. I went with a group to Hirosaki Castle a few weeks back to check out the cherry blossom festival and I took lots of photos. As you can see, it was gorgeous. It reminded me of Korea and the road on the Korean base that was lined with cherry blossom trees. Such awesome scenery to see every day. It actually snowed the day after we went to the festival, making me happy we got out there and saw the trees before they were raped by mother nature.

As you can see in the photos, there was a lot of drinking going on. The two non-drivers in the car in front of us were drinking the whole way up. It made for some entertainment. The trip back to Misawa is the interesting part, though. Due to all the horseplay on the way to Hirosaki, the guy who was driving me back thought it would be funny to scare the crap out of April, the driver of the car in front of us, during the next red light. I was in and out of sleep the whole way back and wasn't really paying attention to what he was talking about, though I wonder if I would have actually tried to dissuade him had I actually been fully conscious. The next red light we hit I hear the door open and I look up. Ahern is running up to the next car. He bangs on the window and promptly turns around to return to his own vehicle. Apparently April had the shit scared out of her and had jumped out of her seat (in the process, as we learned later, letting go of the brake). So Ahern is back in his car congratulating himself and the next thing I notice is April's hazards on, pulling over to the side of the road along with the car in front of her. I just look over at Ahern and ask, "Did you just cause an accident?"

"What? No...! I don't know. I... fuck." That's pretty much how it went down. It was a minor fender bender but the Japanese lady was flipping out and called the cops. Ahern felt terrible, of course. In the end, it didn't wind up being a big deal, which is good. I would be a terrible liar if I said I didn't find the whole thing mildly amusing. It didn't take long for the jokes to start flying (I know what you're thinking, but no, I didn't start them): the bad Asian drivers jokes and jokes about Ahern's dumb idea. After arriving back in Misawa that night, April, Ahern, Rubalcava (who was in April's car during the accident), and I went out for drinks and karaoke. Amazingly, I had a really good time. Not just my typical "hey, I'm out of my room" good time but actually fully enjoying myself. I'm no fan of the bars in Misawa. They pretty much suck. My time in Korea was bearable (and now enjoyable in retrospect) because of the good company. I think I may have finally found some people here in Misawa who appreciate many of the same things I do. We mostly talked literature and music, which was a refreshing change of pace. More importantly, our personalities don't clash. This has become a noticeable problem for me and many of my peers here. I'm happy I had the opportunity to hang out with all of them together.

In other news, I've been trying to get out of the navy by August, my original EAOS. I've put in a request to have my one-year extension canceled. As awesome as it would be to get this time back, there are a few problems I have come across with this. One is that no one in my chain of command seems that committed to helping me out. I'm having issues pushing this request up the chain and I don't know where my chit is right now. This is a minor annoyance and fixable. The main issues are that there is little time left to process everything and it is probably too late to get into the fall semester at ASU. I would also be unlikely to be home in time for at least the first week of classes. If I'm not going to school, there is little reason to get out instead of saving up extra cash. Now I'm thinking of keeping my extension and applying for the winter semester, anyway. Once accepted, I can request to get out of the navy early for education. This would result in more money saved, more time to look for a place to stay, and more time to look for a possible job. I'll be sure to keep you all posted for those of you who will still be around and not running off to grad school. Kirsten is going to Berkeley. What the fuck is that shit!? (No, I'm kidding. Congrats to her.)

I've just had a rather stiff drink, so I'm sure I'm not thinking of everything I want to say. I could complain more about work but I'm sure I've done that enough. I've covered the basics. I've made new friends, I'm on my way out of the navy, and many of my friends have just graduated college and are on their ways to bigger and better things. Congrats to all of you. See you on the outside soon.

Happy, Melissa?

Spider FTW: 10:45

Tue, 14 Apr 2009 12:11:13 GMT

I took an early PRT (physical readiness test) in case I get the class I've been wanting at the end of this month. My push-ups and sit-ups were my usual mediocre numbers (64 & 71 respectively) but I did manage a 10:45 on my run. This is the first time I've been under 11 minutes since boot camp, if I recall correctly. So I'm pretty happy about that. Actually, I'm really happy about that. Hopefully I can keep it up.

In the last six months, I've put on about 15 pounds. How? I have no idea. So it was discouraging but it definitely helps knowing that I can still outrun most of my department. Very satisfying. I think some of the extra weight might be from microwavable food. It's really the only change in my diet. I buy food from the commissary now that I get paid for it. Air force chow halls aren't as cheap as navy galleys (the AF charges by the item instead of a flat rate for all your food) so it's not worth it for me to eat there. I save money going to the commissary. Unfortunately, the only thing I have to cook with right now is a microwave. I might see what I can do about moving off base. As I mentioned, though, I might be gone by the end of the month. I might need to figure out a way to eat healthier. At least I know I'm still in good shape. I just don't want that to change.

How America Does Business

Mon, 13 Apr 2009 12:45:27 GMT

It's been a boring week. On Friday we had a hail and farewell barbecue. We hailed a new lieutenant in our department and said farewell to Tong, a linguist and a pretty cool guy. Goofy, but cool. Tong left on Sunday, so Saturday night I went out for a couple hours for a couple drinks with him and some other people.

Yeah, like I said, my life has been pretty boring this past week. I've mostly been working on training at work and homework for my international relations class at home.

So how many of you have read about the rescue of the captain that was taken hostage by Somalian pirates? "With Hostage in 'Imminent Danger,' Navy Seals Shoot Three Captors, Detain a Fourth." Obama did something right: he "had given standing orders Friday night for the Navy to take action to rescue Capt. Phillips if the danger escalated." I don't think we should have been trying to negotiate to begin with. I think the U.S. Navy should be utilized more for its original purpose. Our country's military is trying to do so much, involving ourselves in things we have no businesses being involved in, that we seem to have forgotten our own history:

The initial challenge to the rapid expansion of U.S. commerce, however, came not from London or Paris but from the corsairs of the Barbary coast. In the 1790s the Algerians again began to prey on U.S. commerce in the Mediterranean. Once again, Congress debated whether the nation ought to buy protection or establish a navy to safeguard shipping. In March 1794 Congress decided to respond with force and passed a naval act that called for the construction of a half-dozen frigates.

It's just so... American, isn't it? As a country, we've never been ones to shy away from a fight. Fighting for what we think is right is perhaps the most inspirational aspect of American history. There have certainly been times when we have fought when we shouldn't but we also have a strong history for fighting when we should. I find it kind of funny that the first U.S. merchant ship taken by pirates since the 19th century is taken back by the Americans using brute force against the pirates. That's how America does business! The Navy Seal snipers rescuing the captain is icing on the cake.

Piracy is an increasing problem and with it disrupting commerce and threatening lives as often as it is at present, I can't believe our navy hasn't done more to help. This is precisely the kind of thing our navy was created for. Now we're too busy playing international politics. Obama could do a lot for his reputation if he takes an aggressive stance against piracy. I hate his economic policies but at least he had enough sense to authorize force against the pirates to rescue the captain. Granted, he tried negotiating first and that only encourages them. Hopefully this comes as a blow to their egos. Next time, let's try a little harder. If there's anything worth using our navy for, it's this. I would gladly go out on a ship to fight piracy. It's certainly a more worthwhile pursuit than anything I'm doing at present.

Nerf War

Tue, 07 Apr 2009 09:16:46 GMT

During lunch today, IT1 Pratt and I went to the BX and bought Nerf guns. We brought them back to work to shoot at people. At the end of the day, about ten seconds after our department senior chief walked out the door, we had a good five minute Nerf war. Or, as Melissa Tse would put it:

(+) Nerf guns

And that was my day today.

My Third Fucking Polygraph!

Mon, 06 Apr 2009 14:08:37 GMT

Welcome back, ladies and gentlemen. Boy, have we got a show for you tonight. I've been keeping pretty busy during my LJ absence these last couple months. First, to whet your appetite, a quick summary: Six nights of drinking, three polygraphs, two snowboarding trips, and a partridge in a pear tree.

My first time snowboarding was an incredible pain in the ass for me. And I mean that in the most literal sense. I probably spent most of the day on my ass.

My biggest blunder happened on the 5.5km trail. While trying to slow down, I snagged the front of my board and flew face-forward into the snow. The snow was not fluffy. When I hit, using my head as an axis, my body flipped over onto my back which forced my head up and whipped it back onto the ground. There was some ringing in the ears and a lot of pain. I was lying in the snow for probably a good 15 minutes. This prompted me to get a helmet for my second trip.

Yeah, I know I look cool. I did a lot better the second time around, though, and didn't really need the helmet. It was really warm, though. I like it.

So let me tell you about polygraphs. For those of you who have never taken a polygraph (I imagine this is most of you), understand this: it's not accurate--at all. I mean, it does what it was designed to do. It monitors how your body reacts to questions and the answers you give but it cannot tell if you're lying or not. Hence why I had to take three polygraphs in a matter of weeks.

The first and second polygraphs were about three hours each. Half of that time is the guy explaining how the equipment works and how the test is going to be conducted. My third polygraph was very last minute and lasted about an hour and a half. The guy calling me in and asking the questions thought I was good the first two times but the bigwigs at the NSA decided my reaction was not good enough to allow me a pass. Here's the problem with the equipment: you can't move. You have to sit still because almost any movement will register on the computer and they can't tell if it's a nervous reaction to the question or just a muscle spasm. I have a problem with sitting still. Apparently I also have a problem with pressure applied to my upper arm. One device used in a polygraph is a pulse monitor not unlike one you'd find at the doctor's office. It's wrapped around your upper arm and inflated with air. During my first group of questions, my arm started to go numb and I couldn't concentrate on anything else. My heart rate must have been up quite a bit. All my answers were invalidated.

Another thing that can affect results? Your thoughts. Anything too racy and, well, there goes the neighborhood. By my third polygraph, the NSA had narrowed the problems down to two questions: Have I ever engaged in espionage or sabotage against the United States? Have I ever committed acts of terrorism against the United States?

The latter I passed rather quickly. The former had to be broken into two questions and I passed the sabotage question effortlessly. And then there was one. You'd think if I had engaged in espionage I'd remember it. Apparently not. BUT WAIT! The guy had to change the word from espionage to spy. Have I ever spied against the United States? Apparently not. But espionage? Well, that's a different story! I told the guy that the word "espionage" reminded me of spy thrillers. "I wanted to ask you if you were thinking of any movies," he said, "but I didn't want to put the idea in your head." I guess the guy didn't realize the kind of active imagination he was dealing with. You have to try a little harder than that to come up with an idea that hasn't occurred to me. Thrillers and action flicks? How could I not be thinking of them. I was taking my third fucking polygraph!

Due to my inability to pass the questions the first time around, three additional questions concerning personal integrity had to be busted out as per NSA regulation. I forget two of them at the moment but by the end of my third test (the only test these questions were used on) I was apparently still reacting to the question "have you ever lied to a superior?" No, never! I didn't react strongly enough for it to be reported, though. Suckers. So, if any of you want more information on polygraphs, feel free to ask. I'll give you the lowdown just in case you ever find yourself in the unfortunate position of having to take one. At least it wasn't a lifestyle polygraph. I hear those can get pretty personal.

In other news, my computer that I built back in AZ with Frank while home on leave arrived six weeks after being shipped. The top cover had broken loose but it was otherwise intact. It runs like a champ and is pretty cool (figuratively and literally) thanks to all the fans and ventilation. My computer is connected to my 40" Sony HDTV with the Sony surround sound system that I won at the command Christmas party. It's a pretty bitchin' set-up. There are many things to love about having a large TV hooked up to a computer but one thing I enjoy most right now is reading comics:

Don't worry, my screen isn't broken. It's just the flash from the camera. I've been using a new program for reading comics called ComicRack. It advertises itself as a kind of iTunes for comics and it delivers. Except iTunes sucks and this is very useful thanks to a complete lack of DRM. I didn't like the program on my laptop just because it used much more memory than the traditional, bare-bones CDisplay. ComicRack has superior zoom options and mouse and keyboard functionality, though. I can deal with CDisplay on my laptop but not so much on this TV. But I don't mean to bore you. My point is this: reading comics on this display is a great experience.

Since I've been back in Misawa I've attended a couple house parties and gone out in town to drink a few times. Nothing out the ordinary or particularly notable except for this last weekend. A guy in our department finished 60-days of restriction last week after being sent to captain's mast for drinking and driving down in Okinawa. He went to pick up cigarettes at the shoppette and drove out of the parking lot the wrong way. The base police caught him and found out he had been drinking. To commemorate this Grant's freedom we had a "coming out party." Two people from our shop made everyone shirts with goofy/ridiculous pictures of Grant. It was classic and Grant never saw it coming. "I've never been punk'd like this before," he said later that night.

On Saturday, a fellow IT in our shop hosted a "rock star party." The idea was for people to show up dressed like rock stars. I joked about going as Billy Idol and the news quickly circulated without the "joke" context. Not one to disappoint, I decided to see what I could scrounge up at the local mall. As logic would have you assume, there is not a big market for blond wigs in Japan and bleaching my hair while in the military was out of the question. So I resorted to buying the only "blond" wig I could find:

I figure that's what Billy Idol would look like if he were an anime character. Here are a couple more photos for your enjoyment:

I've been discovering some good music these last couple months, as well. I kind of lapsed for a while with trying new music. I just got lazy. I'm back to normal now, though, and my two favorites out of everyone I've listened to since I've been back are both Scottish artists. Frightened Rabbit and Amy Macdonald. I highly recommend Frightened Rabbit for any of you who have not heard them. I'm sure some of you are much more ahead of the curve than I but maybe someone can appreciate the recommendation. Seriously, FR is awesome. Listen to them.

Speaking of music, I saw this movie finally:

Whoever chose the soundtrack to that film should be shot. I mean, the movie was mediocre to begin with but a good soundtrack goes a long way. The music in this movie makes already awkward scenes worse. I get that Snyder was trying to stay true to the comic but the details left out stole much of the subtext away from the film and left many viewers confused. Everything Alan Moore puts in his work is put there for a reason. So if you haven't done so yet, go read the graphic novel.

OK, it's time I stop taking up space on your friend's page. I'd put this in an LJ cut but I want my pictures to catch peoples eyes if they try to scroll past my post. ;-) To avoid doing these massive updates and to write more often I'm going to try to do updates at least weekly. If a week passes with no word and you feel the urge to bug me about it, by all means, bug away. Thanks for stopping by, ladies and gents. Until next time...

Hopes & Expectations

Wed, 04 Feb 2009 10:58:09 GMT

Saturday, January 31st. 10:27 A.M. Japan.

I'm on the bullet train on my way up to Hachinohe where I will catch my train to Misawa. The train is blazing through snow flurries now as we make our way north, away from Tokyo. I had to spend a night in Tokyo thanks to a bad engine on the plane in O'Hare. We had to switch planes, delaying us over three hours.

The hotel rooms were tiny. Really tiny. Your room is bigger than the bedroom and bathroom combined. You think, "He doesn't know what my room looks like." Doesn't matter. It's bigger. The other guy I'm traveling with and I originally got a room together. It had bunk beds and barely enough space for our luggage. The room was completely full, no space to maneuver. I got my own room.

Within hours of being back in Japan I realized this culture is starting to wear thin on me. It's not that it's bad. The people are nice but I like the extravagance of Americanism. There's so much to love about Asia but its modesty that once allured me now seems so unbearably humble. I like extravagance and living large. Until that wears thin on me, too.

I'm rereading Watchmen now. I started it on the flight back. I had forgotten just how much information is there and how in depth Allan Moore gets. The movie is going to ruin it just like the movies ruin all of Moore's work. Still, it looks awesome and I'm excited for it. I'm on issue 8 of 12 on my reread. I'm reading it slow like a wine taster sipping on a fine wine. It's a great piece of work and deserves to be fully absorbed. If you haven't read it, you should probably get on that. I don't recommend anyone see the movie without first reading the source material. The film will color your perception of Moore's brilliance just as past films of his work might have. No matter how good you think the films are (and most of them aren't), they just can't measure up. Read the books. You'll be happy you did.

While in Jacksonville, I inadvertently got started on this Zooey Deschanel kick. It started when I watched Almost Famous for the first time in years. I saw the DVD for $5 at Walmart and couldn't pass it up. Then I downloaded a movie off a list I keep on my iPod Touch (I add stuff that catches my attention in stores or conversations). The movie was The Go-Getter. It's good and adventurous and co-stars Zooey Deschanel. My friend and I then went to go see Yes Man in theaters. That was funnier than I expected... and Zooey Deschanel was there. Before seeing any of these films, I didn't know Deschanel was in them and I actually had little interest in her after her role in that abominable adaptation of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Now I was finding that I like her characters, or character as it may be. She doesn't appear to have a wide range as an actress but I like everything she does (except, of course, afore mentioned HGTTG adaptation). Once I saw she starred in Tin Man, the Sci Fi Channel original mini series that updates the story of The Wizard of Oz, I knew I had to see it. I wanted to see it before I knew she was in it, anyway. I watched part 1 the day before I left Florida and parts 2 and 3 on the plane. I had high expectations that were let down a little bit by acting and directing that wasn't quite what I hoped but the series is still good. Now I know I will be actively seeking out new Zooey Deschanel material. I saw her on the cover of a magazine at the airport and immediately opened it to the interview. Apparently she has a record or two out. I guess I'll start there.

The snow is pretty. Hachinohe approaches.
***

Apparently Deschanel only has one album out and it's under the band She & Him. Another interesting fact, Zooey Deschanel and Ben Gibbard got engaged at the end of December. Did not know that.

My trip home totally sucked, by the way. Here's the run down:

Both my flights were delayed. The second one was delayed 3 hours. We had to switch planes due to an engine not starting. The delay caused us to miss the last train from Tokyo to Misawa so we spent the night in Tokyo at this shitty little hotel with rooms smaller than comfortable. The next morning when we got to Hachinohe, all the trains had stopped due to freezing (maybe ice on the tracks... I don't know). So there are three of us (we ran into one of our officers there) freezing our asses of waiting for our last train to Misawa when we finally decide to take a cab to CoCo curry house and meet up with some people so we could drive the rest of the way back to base. It was just ridiculous. Due to being jet lagged, I was up at 0330 the next morning and at 0530 I went out and spent an hour scraping a month's worth of snow and ice off my car. Joy.

So being back in Misawa has done a lot to remind me just why I have to get out of the military. I hate being here. I don't really like the people. I definitely don't like the work. I don't really understand how anyone feels fulfilled doing this job. It's all bullshit. I'm suddenly burdened with a larger workload and higher expectations because I'm a second class, which would be fine under normal circumstances, but I'm expected to know things no one ever bothered to teach me. People here assume knowledge is automatic. It's frustrating because I know my job and that's not the issue. It's all the other inane stuff about the command I have to know. Frustrating. I'm learning to write brag sheets and evaluations right now. I hate it. They keep telling me that this is all for me, it's to better my career. They don't seem to understand I don't have a career. The one thing I hope to gain from this exercise is skills that will help me in writing a decent resume on the outside.

It's funny that no matter how much you say you're not going to make a career out of the military they never believe you. A lot of people who think they're getting out sign the contract at the last minute. Fuck that. Besides, I had a couple people from Korea set a good example for me. If I re-upped I'd never be able to live it down. And that's enough of that.

On another note, the cold weather really makes me feel good. I like coming in from the cold and warming up while sipping a coffee and reading a book or watching a good show. Reminds me of being a kid again around Christmas time in Massachusetts. I was so happy that time of year, like life could get no better. As a kid, I guess that really is the best life has to offer.

I'm currently catching up on Scrubs and The Office. Scrubs, amazingly enough, is still hilarious and still has great music. I also want to say that episode 6 of this season's Office was probably the funniest episode of The Office since season 3.

One more random piece of wisdom before I go: Acoustic Lady GaGa on the piano sounds a bit like Regina Spektor. She's like a talented Britney Spears... with better songs.

Poker Face [Live at The Cherrytree House Piano & Voice Version] by Lady GaGa

Scenesters

Sat, 24 Jan 2009 05:59:26 GMT

After realizing I had been ditched by the only person I know in Jacksonville, I decided to venture out on my own tonight. Something with which, as many of you know, I have never had any qualms. So I headed downtown to The Landing because I read on the Internet that there was a good live music scene there. It was a big blow to my faith in the age old theory "if it's on the Internet it must be true" when I got there to see the crowd was scant and the band was lame. I asked an unusually attractive female bartender (I say "unusual" because most everyone else there was pretty ugly) what there was to do in Jacksonville.

"What kind of person are you?" she asked.

"Depends on the night," I said.

She started listing some things off and I eventually got to live music. She told about an area with classic rock and an area with punk and indie that generally had a younger crowd. I decided to go check out Jacksonville's indie scene. Ugh! I forgot how much I hate scenesters. I thought I knew some indie fucks, but christ... I think what's most annoying about these people that you don't even have to talk to them to figure out how pretentious and pompous they are. They practically embed it into their fashion. Perhaps I should have known better than to show up at this indie punk bar in my all black attire complete with baggy jeans and t-shirt and my North Face jacket draped around me. I'm sure when I pulled back my sleeve for the bouncer to put the multi-colored paper bracelet that looked like something out of a gay-pride parade on me I didn't earn any points by revealing the complete lack of scars on my wrist. Then there was my short, tight, sell-out haircut that screamed "military!" to contend with. I should have expected some of the awkward/dirty looks I received. This isn't to say that the place was completely full of douche bags. I'm sure there were some nice people in there but I didn't exert any effort trying to find them. The band was trying way too hard and didn't play any original material so far as I could tell but the people seemed to love the music. By "seemed to" I mean they all were just kind of standing around, some bobbing their heads. They probably didn't want perspiration to mess up their methodical make-up jobs. I had the following text conversation with my buddy Mike and it cheered me up:

Me: Jacksonville's indie scene sucks balls.

Mike: So?

Me: Just letting you know... Just in case you ever find yourself stranded here.

Mike: The skinny leg jeans are impossible to find there.

Me: Could have fooled me. I was talking about the music but the fashion is lame too.

Mike: I'd head to the beaches it is florida after all even if it's balls cold i'd get some cred.

Me: I think I'll head to starbucks instead. Better than hanging around a bunch of scenester jerks I don't know.

Mike: Oh come on you just have to tell them you've heard music that hasn't even been made yet.

I burst out laughing in the middle of Starbucks at the last comment. It kind of made my night. Sad, I know. I'm pretty optimistic about these sorts of situations because I generally love all new experiences. But I never like getting ditched on a Friday night when I don't know anyone in town. That's just fucking lame.

For clarification, I have no problems with indie music. I like it. I like a wide variety of music and I like not being pompous about it.

The Speech

Wed, 21 Jan 2009 23:39:02 GMT

He said:

In reaffirming the greatness of our nation, we understand that greatness is never a given. It must be earned. Our journey has never been one of short-cuts or settling for less. It has not been the path for the faint-hearted - for those who prefer leisure over work, or seek only the pleasures of riches and fame. Rather, it has been the risk-takers, the doers, the makers of things - some celebrated but more often men and women obscure in their labor, who have carried us up the long, rugged path towards prosperity and freedom.

For us, they packed up their few worldly possessions and traveled across oceans in search of a new life.

For us, they toiled in sweatshops and settled the West; endured the lash of the whip and plowed the hard earth.

For us, they fought and died, in places like Concord and Gettysburg; Normandy and Khe Sahn.

Time and again these men and women struggled and sacrificed and worked till their hands were raw so that we might live a better life. They saw America as bigger than the sum of our individual ambitions; greater than all the differences of birth or wealth or faction.

For us? Try removing all personal incentives for working and see how many people continue to do it. People work to advance their lives and the lives of those they have a personal interest in. For these same reasons we fight for freedom. Ayn Rand told the 1976 graduates of West Point, "You have chosen to risk your lives for the defense of this country. I will not insult you by saying that you are dedicated to selfless service— it is not a virtue in my morality. In my morality, the defense of one's country means that a man is personally unwilling to live as the conquered slave of any enemy, foreign or domestic. This is an enormous virtue."

He said:

Nor is the question before us whether the market is a force for good or ill. Its power to generate wealth and expand freedom is unmatched, but this crisis has reminded us that without a watchful eye, the market can spin out of control - and that a nation cannot prosper long when it favors only the prosperous. The success of our economy has always depended not just on the size of our Gross Domestic Product, but on the reach of our prosperity; on our ability to extend opportunity to every willing heart - not out of charity, but because it is the surest route to our common good.

The market's failings are due to the inherent failure in government regulation, not government's failure to regulate. The market is freedom. Yet when things don't go as desired, people call out to government to help and help it does. It helps to feed itself and solidify its power. Ultimately, each person must decide what is most important to him. To me, freedom is paramount. I want transparency and to be the master of my own destiny. We can build anything we desire without government. People are crafty and find ways to deal. However, we cannot allow mankind's own ingenuity to be turned against us, used to steal from us and enslave us. Business gets its power directly from us, through our spending habits. Government has too many buffers, too much influence, and can so easily exercise power precisely where it has no right to be exercised. As easy as it is to be won over by our new president's charm, don't become blinded by anything so petty as party lines and nationalistic romanticism.

Thomas Paine wrote:

A great part of that order which reigns among mankind is not the effect of government. It had its origin in the principles of society, and the natural constitution of man. It existed prior to government, and would exist if the formality of government was abolished. The mutual dependence and reciprocal interest which man has in man and all the parts of a civilized community upon each other create that great chain of connection which holds it together.

The landholder, the farmer, the manufacturer, the merchant, the tradesman, and every occupation prospers by the aid which each receives from the other, and from the whole. Common interest regulates their concerns, and forms their laws; and the laws which common usage ordains, have a greater influence than the laws of government. In fine, society performs for itself almost everything that is ascribed to government.

Writer's Block: So Long, Farewell

Tue, 20 Jan 2009 04:32:00 GMT

It's the last day in office for George Bush. There's been a lot of talk in the media lately about Bush's legacy. What do you think he will be most remembered for?

View 500 Answers

Bush will definitely be remembered for being unpopular and for being president during the mortgage crisis. What will really decide how he is viewed by future historians, though, will be determined by the outcome in Iraq. Regardless of the fact that we shouldn't be there and the major strategic failings of the war, if Iraq manages to turn into a bustling democracy years down the road, Bush will be looked at in a much more favorable light. I'm not optimistic about this outcome but I think it's possible.

A Few of My Favorite Things (A Picture Post)

Tue, 16 Dec 2008 07:28:29 GMT

Hey everyone! I hope you're all enjoying the holiday cheer this season. I know I am. I rarely do picture posts these days and I wanted to change that. So let me share some of the things I've been enjoying these last couple weeks back up here in Misawa.

Moving up in rank:

I am a second class petty officer now (PO2, or IT2 if you'd like to include my rate). This is the last pay/rank increase I will get before I part ways with the navy in 2010. Some of you might say, "Aw, that's too bad." I'm thinking, "YEAH! I have nothing left to accomplish. I'm fuckin' done!" ;-)

Adding books to my bookshelf:

I love collecting books. It's going to be a bitch every time I move for the rest of my life but I just love my books too much. I also love Stephen Colbert.

My Amazon Kindle:

It's really awesome. Really. I like it more than the Sony Reader I had.

Listening to new good music:

The latest Shiny Toy Guns album is just one of many that I've been enjoying recently. Also, if you don't have MediaMonkey, you should definitely go download it right now and start using it ASAP. I'm not joking. Go use it now.

My POS POV:

Just before I left for Okinawa, a guy at our command gave me his car for free because he knew it was a crap car and he had to get rid of it before he PCSed to his next command. I finally got to use it when I returned from deployment and I actually like it. It's a surprisingly smooth ride. It has good gas millage. It's also a manual, which means I get to shift with my left hand because the Japanese are crazy and drive on the wrong side of the road.

Exploring:

Having my own vehicle now means I get to go places and find things. I've been driving all over the place just because I can. Beats staying in my room or in Misawa.

Dressing up for Christmas parties:

Our command had a Christmas party last Friday and I decided to wear the suit I got in Korea, as I never have any occasion to wear it. The white tie and white shoes I had actually gotten for my white suit (which is also pimpin') but I decided to do a little mix and matching. The party was at a hotel off base, which was pretty cool. Huron got me to try on his hat but I forgot to tilt it for the full pimp effect. My chief was called me a New York mobster before I told him not to insult me. "Fine," he said, "Chicago mobster." Afterwards, we went to the enlisted club then went back off base to hit up the bars. We ran into one of our officers who is leaving soon and he asked me if someone had talked me into wearing the white tie and shoes. I was like, "Uhh... no." Later, one of my buddies comes up and tells me Mr. Virden (the officer) is shit talking me. I started laughing. "What?" I guess he was saying white people can't wear black suits with white shoes or something stupid (he's white himself). I shrugged it off. The people I was hanging out with were like, "You know you look good when you have an officer hating on you." :-)

Winning raffles at Christmas parties:

Yeah, I totally won this at our command party. My ticket was the first one picked, too. That was pretty fuckin' sweet. I plan on building a desktop and connecting it to an HDTV and this sound system. I'm looking forward to completing the project.

So that has been my time back in Misawa. For those of you who do not know (which is probably most of you), I will be arriving in Phoenix on the night of the 21st. I would like to see as many of you as possible, so if you would like to make some plans please let me know. Plans must be done because time is limited for me. I'm only taking about two weeks worth of leave and I'm spending a few days in Vegas for New Year's. I also need to spend time with family (that said, the 24th and, obviously, the 25th are out). Group activities are good since it allows me to see multiple people at once. So start brain storming and let me know what you come up with. :-)

Women Are Always Wrong

Sun, 14 Dec 2008 10:42:07 GMT

More proof:

Freedom Rings

Thu, 11 Dec 2008 08:09:23 GMT

Oh good, the IWF listened to me.

Writer's Block: Untimely Passing

Wed, 10 Dec 2008 23:24:30 GMT

RIP John Lennon. The list of sudden and unexpected celebrity deaths is long—Princess Di, Heath Ledger, Kurt Cobain, Marilyn Monroe, and many more. Which one affected you the most on an emotional level?

View 500 Answers

Douglas Adams. Yes, I understand he's not a celebrity on the scale of Lennon, Cobain, or Monroe. He's not a movie star or rock star but I never get attached to those types of celebrities emotionally. But a person who can write a book that makes me laugh an think, I'm hooked. I was about half-way through Mostly Harmless when I heard Adams had died. As I was approaching the end of the ginormous book The Ultimate Hitchhiker's Guide, I was already thinking about the next rumored Adams book and how it might play out and how many more laughs I have to look forward too. Alas, the next book, as Adams wanted it, would never be written. I've probably listed him because Adams knew how to keep me laughing virtually non-stop through all of his books but that's a rare trait in literature and one unmatched so far.

New Study Links Kissing to Hearing Loss

Wed, 10 Dec 2008 09:59:48 GMT

Kissing is dangerous. I like a partner to be passionate in her kissing but this is just ridiculous.

$25 Bil Well Spent

Tue, 09 Dec 2008 21:20:56 GMT

Say What!?

Tue, 09 Dec 2008 12:51:56 GMT

Dear UK,

Back yo ass up!

Sincerely,
Me

PS. The censorship is not "raising tough questions." The question and answer are simple. Is it right to censor the public under any circumstances? No.

Here With an Epic Update

Sun, 07 Dec 2008 15:05:54 GMT

I realize it's been a while since I've really chronicled anything that's been going on in my life. My last real post was about the maintainers getting arrested and that was my second flight on deployment. Now I'm back in Misawa and things should be relatively quiet for the next few weeks before I go home of the holidays.

Det was somewhat eventful, I suppose; though I'm not too sure how much more eventful than normal. A big group got down there a day before I left and I couldn't help but think I was going to miss some good times. But at the same time, I have to remember why I came back up: to go home, visit family and friends, and hopefully make some memorable times myself. So don't disappoint, people!

In October, some friends got me into snorkeling. I had never used a snorkel on a tropical island before and generally had a low opinion of them. As you might expect, pools and the North Atlantic leave something to be imagined when wearing a snorkel. My first time out I saw some neat things but the waters were choppy and we didn't spend very long out there. My second time we went out to a small(er) island and there were much fewer fish out and about. I don't know if it was the time of day or if the season was changing. It was still nice, though. It's always nice to get out to the ocean but I guess you guys wouldn't know much about that. I kid.

Halloween was pretty damn fun. We were changing buildings the next day and many of us had packing to do and I certainly didn't enjoy the thought of moving with a hangover. But not even an imminent Armageddon could keep a sailor from a night of drinking and debauchery.

The night started out at the enlisted club where people were partying it up and getting ready to see Ashanti perform. My friends couldn't get tickets so we only stayed there for an hour or so. Ashanti performed on base for free the next day, anyway. And she's not good enough to waste money on. After the E club we headed out in town. Our first stop was the X Bar. the only one of us in a costume was Pratt who was wearing a panda costume he picked up for $60 at a local costume shop. The Asian women loved it! They have some kind of thing for pandas, I guess. Or they're big into that "furries" porn. Whatever Asians saw when they looked at Pratt is beyond me but us South Park fans had a completely different image come to mind. It was pretty funny, though. Other events that night include more names none of you care about. Huron and Smith wound up going after the same girl before Huron got sidetracked and "had it out" (verbally) with Urban (whom Huron always had some issue with). Pratt was hitting on some cute chick before a guy who was not old enough to be the woman's father told my panda garbed friend to keep his paws off his daughter. I wound up talking ot the guy later and found out he has two daughters, neither of which had yet to reach double digits in their ages. So that was pretty funny. I believe we went to the strip club Center Stage after that but it's hard to be sure. The strip clubs in Okinawa are pretty sweet, to say the least. Put up a dollar and the girls will come over, put the bill on your mouth, and remove it with their breasts. Put of five dollars and you get pulled up on stage and probably face humped. It's crazy. The Halloween themes made it all more kinky. Later on when the strippers were changing out and there was a period of empty stage, Pratt went up in his panda costume and started spinning around the poles. I don't recall him getting any tips so he must have sucked.

So that was my Halloween and my biggest night out for a couple weeks until we went out to see this classic hard rock band that was pretty awesome. After that show we all migrated to a karaoke bar for some food, more booze, and horrible singing to the tunes we all know and love. I think what I loved most about that night was that I was an E-4 out with officers and chiefs, among others, and no one mentioned (or perhaps no one thought to mention) that I was out past the E-4 and below curfew of midnight. Perhaps the most redeeming quality about the navy and all of its stupid rules is that there are so many who don't care about the stupid rules and look out for their people.

Then, about four days later, I was on my way to Thailand for what I expected to be at least a week-long trip. We wound up being in Thailand for a little more than 48 hours before we were pulled back due to what we realized was a rather asinine mission (this had nothing to do with the protests that erupted days later). Nonetheless, a lot can be accomplished in Thailand in 48 hours, even with a 10.2 hour mission in the middle of it, and I can attest to that. I was there with Pratt, Chief Wang, Chief Schrawyer, and LT Larkins. Chief Wang has been in the navy for over 19 years now (so close to that retirement check for the rest of his life) and this man knows Asia and he definitely knows Thailand. He's always good to go out with. There are definitely stories to tell but I don't really feel like writing them down right now. You'll just have to remind me in the future to talk about mooning, strip clubs, soapies, old men picking up hookers, and other things I'm disinclined to talk to you about.

When I got back to Okinawa, I found out I had made 2nd class. So I'll have 9-12 months of extra pay before I get out. That will be nice. I'm trying to save up a nice sum of money right now as I'll be needing it for things like a car, a place to stay, and time between work. I also want to start investing in property. An excellent time for it, don't you think?

Anyway, the next couple weeks had some good weather. It was nice to get out, go down to the ocean, and take in the view. There was a great restaurant right by the sea wall called Trasit Cafe. The second story had a patio with a fantastic view. I loved it.

I had to fly for Thanksgiving and the officers pitched in to buy the crew a turkey meal from Popepeys, complete with mashed potatoes, gravy, and biscuits. My command was also having a turkey dinner, which was ready about an hour after we got back to the barracks. It was a good time but not much to tell about. We went out, had a good meal, and socialized. There was some delicious pumpkin cheese cake, which I had never heard of before. When cleaning up, I threw away a plate of bones which contained the wish bones one of my coworkers wanted to have people pull apart for tradition's sake. I apologized but when she told me to fish them out of the garbage I told her she was out of luck. That was pretty much it for Thanksgiving.

The second to last night before I left, a small group of us went out to have some fun. The night started with ¥50 (about $.50) beer. A restaurant down in Okinawa called Sais (not sure exactly how it's spelled) sells beer for ¥50 from 6 to 8 PM every evening. Some people said starting off here was a bad idea but beer isn't a problem. I never have a problem with beer. After Sais we hit up the X Bar where Pratt and I sang some J. Guiles Band (Centerfold!) before finishing our drinks and moving on. Next we hit up this Irish bar (or pub as the owner calls it) run by this Irishman who has been in Okinawa for quite some time. Apparently he knew the EP-3 crew that went down in China back in 2001. On our way in he saw my Red Sox shirt and said "Fuck Boston!" "Fuck Boston? Fuck you!" Yeah, that guy was pretty cool. he had some U2 CDs out ("U2? Do you guys even claim them as Irish anymore?" "Fuck U2!") and a Manchester United banner hanging up ("Is this an Irish pub or a British Sports bar?"), so I busted the guy's ass about that a little bit. Then he gave us all free shots of whiskey. After that, I started talking to this Japanese guy sitting at the bar by himself. He wound up being the writer and publisher of a local pamphlet that was monthly or weekly or something. I was pretty drunk by this point. I talked about wanting to be a journalist and how I thought it was cool that he published his own pamphlet. He gave me a couple of the pamphlets but I was so far gone by the end of the night that there was no way to expect I'd still have them come morning. Anyway, the guy must have enjoyed my company because he bought me a glass of whiskey. I drank it all up.

After the Irish pub, we went over to Jack Nasty's. The owner of that place, Jack, is some kind of cross-dressing local rock star and he had the videos to prove it. Behind the live band is a TV with never-ending clips of Jack up on stage in drag, playing to large, excited crowds and participating in weird antics. The band there, by the way, kicks ass. It's made up of four middle-aged Japanese guys you would never suspect for rockers. The bassist looks like a total bum (clothes and all) but he rocks the bass like a pro and belts out lyrics in a deep, melodic voice, absent of any accent. My first time there I was impressed.

After Jack's I'm told we hit up some bars on the way to Center Stage. I have absolutely no recollection of these other bars. However, I remember walking into Center Stage and then spending most of my time there in the bathroom. I have heard it said that the only thing I missed was the sink. After they got done hosing the room down, it was mere minutes later I found myself back in there with the bar tender throwing his arms up in defeat. The next day my buddy and fellow IT, Barker, told me he had been feeding me triple jack-and-cokes at the bars before Center Stage. Again, I don't remember this at all. "What the fuck!" I yelled at him. But I was laughing about the incident when my hangover was gone and at the point when you can laugh off such things, it's hard to stay mad. That night I had to move over to a hotel on Camp Foster for a night. I spent it resting and recuperating in my $110 suite. That was pretty nice.

I've probably talked a lot about things many of you don't care about but I would like to try keeping track of more things that happen in my life. I recently got a message from wefeelfine.org about including a picture of mine from my New Year's post a couple years back in their upcoming book. I went back and re-read the post, remembering fond memories that I had completely forgotten. If for no other reason, this is worth keeping a journal. I also know Chris Brennan recently urged people in his LJ to talk about their lives more on here to better stay in touch with one another. A good idea that I would like to keep from procrastinating on so often.

That's it for now. It's late here and I have work in the morning. Ugh.

Intelligence and the Art of Restraint

Wed, 03 Dec 2008 13:30:04 GMT

Congratulations to India on reaching the point in the aftermath of their terrible national tragedy at which they start blaming their own government:

Indian intelligence agencies are leaking information that they gave about half a dozen warnings to the government in Maharashtra state - of which Mumbai is the capital.

While a unique situation in its own right, it brings to mind the accusations of foreknowledge of 9/11 and the attack on Pearl Harbor. Governments are often faced with making decisions on what to act on and what not to act on and they always risk upsetting citizens no matter what decision they make. I would make the case that it is better to err on the side of freedom. Some may say that this is a horrible thing to say in the wake of what has been called the most organized terrorist attack since September 11th but in no way do I mean to say that the people in Mumbai or New York or Pearl Harbor should have lost their lives due to inaction. Other people might say that freedom and security are not ideas opposed to one another. I disagree. I think most people's concept of security is diametrically opposed to freedom.

The consequences of September 11th on U.S. policy are seen in the news everyday. War, the PATRIOT Act, secret prisons, prison abuse, unwarranted wiretapping... The truth is that what is happening in America today is so minute compared to the oppression in so many countries around the world. Yet look at the kerfuffle that something like the PATRIOT Act has caused among Americans. This is a direct result of 9/11, though, and the desire to up the ante in U.S. security. People were afraid and upset with the failures in our government that might have allowed such an attack to slip through the cracks. Those who consider 9/11 a failure of the Bush administration are among those responsible for the PATRIOT Act and the Iraq War.

I'm not saying that government shouldn't work to improve intelligence or security. Given the nature of my job, I understand the importance of intelligence and as of late I have come to more understand its limitations and the necessity to improve it. Regardless, with any important piece of intel any government must arrive at the crossroads where a decision must be made; a decision that is bound to affect the public in some way whether they know it or not. To completely protect the public from every threat would require a crackdown that would not be accepted in any democracy. A democratic government that is supposed to be protecting the freedom of its people cannot jump the gun on threats that are vague and may not even seem plausible or possible.

This whole thing has made me think about what kind of actions we can now expect from the Indian government. Consider the fact that attacks on this scale always embarrass the government it happened under. Whether it was their fault or not, it looks bad. Now that the public and press are playing the blame game and pointing fingers, I figure an embarrassed government is more likely to go to greater lengths to "secure" their country. It sounds nice but think about what that really means. It means people will have to give up a some freedom in return for some security. If you think this has worked out well so far in the U.S. then fret not. If you think the restrictions of freedom on what is really a comparatively small number of people in this country has been a failed experiment, perhaps it's time to start scrutinizing. And please don't kid yourself about a better way of increasing security while maintaining the same level of freedom. History is not on your side.

"They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety."

</soapbox>

Obligatory Post

Wed, 05 Nov 2008 10:22:37 GMT

I feel it's only right that I join everyone in making a statement about the election. As I'm sure many (read: all) of you know, history was made just hours ago when the United States elected its first black president. It's weird for me to think that history was made today. I think for many Americans in my generation, race has never been an issue in judging a person's character. So I find it strange that today it's such a big deal to have elected a black president but it is a big deal. In spite of my political differences with Obama (to put it lightly), I am, on some level, happy with what has been accomplished today. I would be lying if I said that Obama's election did not excite me in any way. I'm eager to see how Obama's rhetoric and international appeal might improve national unity and America's reputation. I think Obama could be good for immigration (if the effects of his popularity are not offset by globalization, which has allowed people is foreign countries to make a better living while staying close to family in their home nation). Living in a nation that was built by immigrants, it does excite me to think that our country's popularity and promise of a better life might once again inspire people to emigrate to America. It's also exciting to think that we might once again have a president that is not so divisive. I remember Mr. Helsel back in AP history talking with some affection about Ronald Regan in spite of their idealogical differences (though I suspect he had more conservative tendencies than he let on) because Regan had the ability to make people proud to be Americans. Obama also recognized Regan for his great leadership qualities and it seems Obama might have picked up some good political instincts from the old gipper.

I know most of you reading this were excited by the news today. You have much more faith than I do about this ushering in a new period of change in America (I think politics are pretty cyclical in this country), although I really don't want the kind of political change Obama is offering. But I'm not here to rain on your parade. I'm happy that you're happy and, as I've pointed out in the above paragraph, I have things to be happy about myself. If all else fails, I can always move to China, which seems to be, as one of my co-workers jokingly pointed out, more capitalist than the U.S. these days. I hope you all went out to eat, drink, and be merry after the results came through.

Also, I know most of you voted at the polls, so I'll share some words from an email my father sent me on the subject. I liked what he had to say and I suspect many of you will agree:

I enjoy going to the polls on Election Day. It may be less convenient, but with so few community activities left in society, I enjoy doing something that as a nation we can say we do together. I see some neighbors I know, and mostly meet people I don’t know, but I like the pageantry, the signs, the sense of anticipation and excitement.

Hope you all had a good night. Here's to getting Bush out of the White House.

To Vote or Not to Vote...?

Fri, 31 Oct 2008 06:45:55 GMT

At the beginning of this deployment, I volunteered to be one of the voting representatives for our detachment down here in Okinawa. I took on this "responsibility" a few days before October 4th, the date by which a large number of states required voting registration to be post-marked. A couple of people told me they were interested in registering and I told them about the October 4th deadline but they never got back to me for further information. I guess it wasn't that important to them. Truth be told, I'm not the type to preach about the value and importance of voting. I'm not going to tell you it's your civic duty as an American citizen to vote. That's just stupid. Penn Jillette of the famous Penn & Teller TV show and Vegas magic act often says the only way to waste your vote is to vote. In a way, he's right. On the other hand, the only way to be heard is to vote.

This is why I consider voting to be of some importance. This is also something that has been ingrained in me since I was a child when my father was running for public office to be a selectman of our town in Massachusetts. I remember going door-to-door with my dad to pass out fliers and seeing my dad giving out lawn-signs. I was exposed to campaigning at a young age and during my father's re-election campaign saw how vicious things could turn in politics even for something as small and inconsequential (comparatively) as a board of selectmen. My father lost his second bid. My feelings towards politics have been mixed throughout my life. On the one hand, I've always had my very political father imbuing in me a sense of importance in taking an active part in our political process. It's important to vote (Republican), my father would tell me. The parenthesized word was usually implied, sometimes stated in a half-joking manner. On the other hand, choices in politics are very limited and usually the choices consist of people looking to improve themselves at the expense of others. Politics is a parasitic business.

So this year I decided to do something that seemed simple and logical, I sent a message with my vote. I told the GOP and the Democrats that I don't like what either of them have to say and I voted Libertarian. Many have told me that I threw my vote away. Others have used different words to let me know of their disappointment. This is what is wrong with our our system of politics. Voting for the person I actually like most is frowned upon. Stepping outside the two-party system is a political sin in this country. It's seen as letting the "other guy" win. Well, the simple, unfortunate truth is that I don't give two-shits about whether Obama or McCain is sitting in the oval office come January 20th. I don't like either of them and neither of them will have the ability to change the system to the degree they claim they want to. I'm slightly angered by the fact that people would look down on my voting in a way that is most representative of my views just because they think I should vote for one of the major party tickets. It has nothing to do with voting for one candidate over the other, only voting for our entrenched system of politics. Moreover, I am a registered voter of Arizona. It's no secret who is winning the state's electoral votes.

Should Obama win the election (as is looking more likely every day), I will be happy to have a president who is more elegant, polished, popular than Bush. I'll probably despise every piece of legislation he tries to pass, though. If McCain is elected, I will be happy to have a president who seems slightly (emphasis on slightly) more informed on how economics really work than Obama and who is more concerned with balancing the budget than "spreading the wealth" (even though actually balancing the budget is impossible with our military spending right now). Either way, I won't be happy with with the guy in the White House, so I decided to send a message with my vote, hoping that the numbers will add-up enough to make major candidates notice they are losing votes.

Out of what respect I have left for politics and those who participate in it, I opted to help my unregistered coworkers who desired to vote in this year's election. That turns out to have been no one. I can't say I blame them. Voting will probably only make a difference in swing-states but even then, it's easy to be jaded with the system. Mostly, I agree with what Penn Jillette has to say in his video on voting. His major points are that you can't vote against someone, telling people it doesn't matter who they vote for as long as they vote is stupid, and if you want your vote to really matter, "vote for a nut." "They will really, really pay attention to the votes that go outside the two-party system," he says. The only way to really bring about change is to let the two major parties know you want something different. Obama might be running on "hope" and "change" but he will be able to change little and Democrats will resort to celebrating the same small victories that are celebrated with any administration as bills are passed here and there, shifting money around, and sustaining the political system that feeds fat cats like Obama and McCain. Years down the road we'll have another Republican in the White House and when all the liberals are griping about the same things they've been griping about for the last eight years it will be more evident than ever how little has changed in in American politics.

"Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job."
-Douglas Adams

Palin As President

Thu, 16 Oct 2008 08:23:51 GMT

Palin As President

This shit is hilarious.

Con Air

Wed, 08 Oct 2008 11:22:55 GMT

Some of the most fun I have is on deployments. So are some of the longest, most miserable days. While I wouldn't consider my last flight one of my most miserable days, it was certainly a long one and it didn't get off to a good start.

For starters, during the brief before the flight, the ensign conducting the brief alerted the crew to a certain...um..."situation" and I made a stupid joke in the context of the brief that we were all going to get shot down and die. It was one of those spur of the moment, context jokes. I was scolded by my own officer after the brief to never make such jokes around the other half of the crew we fly with. Oh, right, I said. Superstitions. As shitty as our planes are, they have a good record of not getting shot down and the crews have a good record of not dying. Seems my logic trumped their superstitions as I live to tell the tale. I still felt bad about making the joke, though, because after I made it the mission commander felt he had to assure everyone in the room that we were all going to be fine (I thought it was funny because I never had any reason to assume otherwise). Being a fan of sports (especially baseball) I know how superstitions can fuck with people's heads. The superstition itself holds no water but the mental effects are real. I really didn't want anyone thinking about my stupid joke during the mission. I don't think it stuck in anyone's mind, though. There would soon be other distractions.

When we got out to the plane we saw security forces waiting behind us when we got out of our van. We were curious as we approached the bird but just shrugged it off because we had work to do. We got on the plane and were getting ready to preflight our equipment when some commotion at the windows alerted us to a situation outside the plane. The damned air force security forces were arresting our maintainers. All the plane maintainers were on the ground, the security forces had their guns ready (mostly M-16s, I think), and eventually they started handcuffing the guys on the ground. Now they all had their stomachs on the ground and hands cuffed behind them. With apples in their mouthes they'd be ready for a Christmas roast. All of us on the plane were all, "WTF!!!" Others were like, "STUPID AIR FORCE!" The whole thing delayed us about an hour and fifteen minutes. Our MC went down and started chewing out the guy in charge. I was still on the plane doing preflight checks. I have a window so I was watching our MC rapidly moving his lips and gesticulating in a very irritated manner. Apparently the security forces there weren't allowed to arrest officers without the presence of another officer but one or two of our enlisted crew members had already been taken away. The rest of us enlisted guys were like, "Fuck that!" I told one of the O's half-jokingly that I wasn't going to step off the plane until it was all cleared up. The security forces aren't cleared to come on the plane so we were all pretty much off limits.

The issue was that we had crossed this red line that no one is supposed to cross unless the mission commander takes control of the aircraft. The problem was that our mission command DID take control of the aircraft. Either there were some communication problems with the security guys or the rules had changed and the crew didn't know about it. Either way, damned air force guys got all giddy with glee that they got to do something that no one bothered to use common sense before treating our crew like Guantanamo Bay prisoners (hyperbole mine). Umm... Same team? Hello? Apparently there was one guy (probably the one who made the call to have our guys arrested) who got lit up and is being disciplined in some way. It was the most ridiculous thing I had ever seen happen at work.

Afterwards, the jokes were flying. One of our guys drew a draft for a det flight-suit patch depicting a guy aiming his gun down at a guy on the ground next to a van. One of the O's wanted a patch with the words "Con Air" somewhere on it. I felt bad for the maintainers, though. On top of all that we wound up being in the air for nearly ten-and-a-half hours. SUCK!

And that's your crazy navy story for today. I hope you enjoyed it.

Know Thy Enemy

Thu, 02 Oct 2008 06:22:17 GMT

Everyone here thinks I'm pro-Obama because I've been reading The Audacity of Hope. The only appropriate response I can think of is, "Know thy enemy."

Supplemental information - I actually purchased all four of the following ebooks for a 100% rebate from Fictionwise.com and put them on my Kindle. The rebate money can only be used at that website, however, so it's probably not such a great deal for those of you who don't have a reader or just don't like ebooks. Of course, unoffically and off the record, I'm always willing to share.

The books:

Worth the Fighting For: What I've Learned from Mavericks, Heroes, and Politics
by John McCain & Mark Salter
The Audacity of Hope: Thoughts on Reclaiming the American Dream
by Barack Obama
Sarah: How a Hockey Mom Turned Alaska's Political Establishment Upside Down
by Kaylene Johnson
Promises to Keep: Joseph Biden On Life and Politics
by Joe Biden

What If...?

Mon, 29 Sep 2008 12:05:03 GMT

What if you remembered every face you ever laid eyes on? Every person you glanced at on a busy street of New York City or in a packed restaurant during your lunch break? How much would this increase the odds of you running into someone you've seen before in the future? Would it be weird? Would you say, "I once saw you sitting in a Starbucks on 42nd street in your long brown jacket, sipping and staring vacantly out the window."? Would you have to explain, "No, I'm not a stalker. I was just passing by. It's this thing with my memory."? Would you even be interested enough to strike up a conversation? Because I think you should be.